a little bit of summer, a little bit of spring

I am feeling nostalgic for my life a year ago. This is a a re-occurring issue. My state of mind, my level of excitement, confidence and inspiration for the future that I was embarking on then and am currently living now; not quite what I had in mind. Then, living on the outskirts of a different life; an imaginary life that i found so captivating and invigorating. A life that was raw and exciting. untouched, unknown. 

In ways I consider myself having the same psyche as Paul Gauguin; always wanting more; and ultimately he never found what he was looking for, and as I go through life I wonder If the same will become of me.

I remember days when it was just getting warm; the days were getting longer the hunger to be outside, the wild things. (On a side note I consider summer to bring out the most sinister people in all of us, as winter turns everyone into their own version of a hermit.)